There have been many experiments conducted to find the daddy of all search engines. To date, despite Microsoft’s best efforts, Google have always won. They currently command around 91% of the marketplace. Bing has around 3%, Yahoo has another 3% and everyone else fights over tiny proportions of the remaining 3%. You can find out more about these riveting statistics here.
Pie chart made using Sporkforge
Market share statistics are boring. Why? Because empires come along, rule for a while and fall. Google is no exception. I’m no Nostradamus, but I’m certain this pattern will hold true for the search engine giant. Hence, for me, investigating these stats is like watching a Rom-Com; dull, as we can all guess the (yawn) eventual outcome (snore).
Investigations into the common challenges faced by the mightiness of Bing and Google are, in my humble opinion, far more interesting. Both search engines are in the same market. They are trying to attract the same audience. Their audience are internet users who are looking for stuff. Stuff that interests them. Stuff that concerns them.
But these investigations only scratched the surface. Exterminate 3 throws Bing users into the ring for a cage fight with Google users. Google commands 91% of the market, but do they have the kind of life forms they would want using their fantastic web delving services? Does Bing have users with more functioning brain cells? Which of these two search engines has users they might want to brag about? Both? Neither? I know which my money is on…
Search Engine Science
The recipe of advanced scientification I have employed for Exterminate 3 consists of two simple elements:
- A question: WHY DOES MY?
- The 26 letters of the alphabet – A to Z
I have combined them in my Search Query Cook Pot of DoomTM. So, for Bing it works like this:
[Why does my1] [Letter of the alphabet2]
I’ve already run this complex formula for Google in Exterminate 1. To replicate it would be boring, so I’ve changed it a little by adding a 3rd dimension to the Google queries – one of our senses. I chose SMELL. So the queries I placed into Google work like this:
[Why does my1] [SMELL2] [Letter of the Alphabet3]
Using two different formulas might seem unfair, but the second formula only works in Google. So I had to use an alternative for Bing, or we wouldn’t have any Microsoft predictions to laugh at learn from.
Enough waffle. Let the Bing vs Google fray of search amazement commence.
Why Does My…?
Google and Bing try to be helpful when you conduct a search by predicting what you might be looking for. They do this by presenting you with the things other people have searched for the most.
Dear god, I’m ashamed to be human.
But, feelings of horror and shame aside, the results please me. People often feel as though they are at the mercy of mighty corporations like Google and Microsoft. But this investigation proves that these corporations are actually at the mercy of users who perform searches that wouldn’t be necessary if they bathed more often or had a triple figure IQ.
Neither Google nor Bing has the edge when it comes to quality of end user. Neither have users anyone in their right mind would want to brag about. And, most importantly, neither of them seems able to do anything about it.
May this joyous news bring you a Christmas filled with wonderment, and a new year filled with hope.